Our Journey Has Begun...

Well, I have finally done it!... After much encouragement from my little sister, I have finally created a blog of our own for family, friends, and fellow Bloggers to check in as they choose. It is still in the "design" mode, as I try and figure out what I'm actually doing. (I've yet to figure out how to make my header block larger and fill in the side gaps...any help with that and/or other tips are welcomed!!) Anyhow, I suppose it is about time that I have my own site, as I've been a faithful "follower" of many blogs over the past year or two...especially those of fellow adoptive parents, either in the process, or already home with their little blessings.

As a very few of you already know, we have begun our journey to adopt a SN (special needs) child from China. For as long as I can remember, I have always had a strong heart for adoption. But the interest sparked again after my car accident in '07, which eventually lead me down the road to back surgery in April of '08. My doctors advised that physically carrying a baby to term could have adverse affects on my back, and therefore recommended that I be done having babies. It was hard to hear at first, as I've always wanted to have at least one more. But I have since come to terms with it, grateful that we already have two beautiful and healthy kids and knowing that adoption was always an option in my heart, anyway. This has been an easy road for me to take, but not as much for Martin. Admittedly, for the more selfish reasons now that our children are older and "time" seams to already be of short supply. Our kids are at ages where they are extremely self-sufficient and can take care of themselves in most aspects of daily life, so to start over with a little one has been a lot to think about...and for me, too. But I cannot live a life of regrets, and I'm grateful to have a husband that supports me out of love and trust in following my heart and the path that I believe God is leading us down. At some point, I will be able to share those details with you. But because of where we are in the process, I need to be very cautious about how much I write for the time being. If you are a friend or extended family member who is finding this out for the first time, just know that this was not something that happened over night or on a whim...it has been brewing in my heart for a LONG time, and something that we have been VERY prayerful about. I am so aware that God's timing is everything, and I trust that He will continue to open the doors necessary to bring our child home, if indeed she is the little girl He has for us.

We have a specific child that we would like to adopt, and our agency is doing all that they can to expedite the process so that our papers reach the CCAA while her file is there for review. If you are familiar with the China program, then you already know that they frown upon "matched" adoptions for a pre-identified child that is not already on the SN Waiting List. However, depending on the level of a child's SN, they may consider it. Yet there are never any guarantees that they will grant our agency's request, so this is where I have to put my continued trust in the Lord. I can't wait until the day when we have been approved and matched with our little sweetie and I have a photo that I can share. It has been both exciting and overwhelming. The agency we are working with has been wonderful so far. Please keep us in your prayers for a smooth expedited process, as it is necessary for our papers to get there soon, in order for the CCAA to consider a match. Whatever the outcome, I trust that it is part of the road we must travel to bring home whatever child God has already reserved for us. However, I do strongly believe in my heart of hearts, that it is this particular little girl...that she is the one who is meant to be our daughter. But I have to be so careful. I know I'm not supposed to let my heart grow this attached already, but it's too late. I will always have a love in my heart for her, no matter what the outcome. The love I have for her has been birthing in my heart for several months now...it began when I was part of a prayer team that prays for these kids as they prepare for surgery. It is not something fleeting or that I have been able to shake...it has only grown with time...and even more so with recent affirmations and open doors that I believe have been God-breathed all the way! I do believe that He places the desires we have in our hearts for a reason. If you are willing and give your heart to Him, He will use you in ways you never dreamed of. I can't wait until the day I can share with you the details that led us to this point. You will be blown away by all that the Lord has done! In the meantime, please keep us in your prayers. We have a very, very busy month or two in front of us. I will update with any news that I am able to share on this site. So keep checking back. It will likely be slow for awhile...but I will still be sharing other family updates, photos of the kids and any necessary venting or profound thoughts of my own as the days progress.

I leave you with this scripture that is near and dear to my heart...

"For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition which I asked of Him..." ~ 1 Samuel 1:27